Posts

Twas the Night Before Christmas With Edits

/0 Comments/in /by

By Gerard Braud

The poem, Twas the Night Before Christmas, is only 56 lines long. As writing goes, it’s pretty perfect. But we all know there are people where you work, who feel compelled to make edits, no matter how perfect your writing is. Maybe it’s the CEO or CFO, or an engineer, IT guy, accountant, doctor, or even the lawyer. Sure, they just want it to be more accurate and legally correct. But are all of those edits really necessary?

So for those of you who feel compelled to make edits, and to those of you who have been victimized by a red pen, I offer to you this special version of the poem, with edits. ©2018

Twas the Night Before Christmas With Edits

 

 Twas the nocturnal period preceding the annual Christian festival, when throughout the domicile

 

No one of consequence was moving, including the rodents

 

Long socks receptacles were suspended near the thermal unit, with safety as a top priority

in expectation that a legendary Christian Bishop, born in the region of modern day Turkey, in or about 280 A.D., who was later Canonized by the Pope, would arrive post-haste

 

The humans below the legal age of majority, were reclined comfortably within their sleeping apparatuses

 

While apparitions of dehydrated fruit, filled their subconscious

 

And the maternal figure donning a headscarf, and I, in a consensual relationship, did likewise

 

Had just reached a state of extended hibernation

 

When in an external grassy zone, a ruckus occurred

 

I spontaneously ejected myself from my sleeping device, to evaluate the situation

 

Away to an opening in the wall I expedited myself

 

With vigor, I forcefully opened a set of protective panels

 

The satellite of the earth unified with the flakes of ice crystals

 

Gave the reflective quality of noon, to objects below

 

When, while visibly curious there appeared

 

A smaller than common vehicle of transport and eight proportional deer, common to subarctic regions

 

With a demure heavy equipment operator, so agile and prompt

 

I surmise instantly that it must be the aforementioned Saint

 

More rapid than birds of prey, the mammals came

 

And he exuded a high-pitched sound, then proclaimed their given names

 

You may Google the historic names if necessary, since corporate policy prohibits us from releasing names without consent… and because some of the names imply behavior that may be deemed as inappropriate or suggestive, and not in keeping with our policies regarding sexual harassment in the workplace

 

To the top of covered shelter protecting the entrance to our domicile

To the top of the vertical structure supporting the inner and outer cladding

 

Now run or travel somewhere in a great hurry, bolt, and/or gallop

 

As foliage void of moisture within a tropical cyclone, having winds exceeding 74 miles per hour

 

When they encountered structures that hindered forward progress, they accelerating upward

 

So up to the structure’s ridgeline the beast maneuvered

 

With the vehicle at capacity with objects of play; and the Bishop inside as well

 

And then like chimes, I heard on the ridgeline

 

The exaggerated movement, and clatter of horny feet

 

As I extracted my head from the framed opening, and was moving in a circular motion

 

Down the vertical channel for combustion gases, came the Saint, with great haste, void of OSHA required protective gear

 

His wardrobe consisted of natural mammal pets with hair still attached, covering his entirety, much to the protest of certain animal rights activist

 

The garments were discolored with combustion residue

 

A sum of replicas were suspended to the rear of his torso

 

And like a merchant of goods, he displayed all of his wares

 

His visual organs – how they reflected the light

His facial indentions exhibited great joy

 

His face just below his eye socket, was reminiscent of blooming thorn-filled plants; his nostril area like ripe, round fruit

 

His pursed lips, they provoked such dry amusement

 

And his unshaven facial hair was similar in color to the crystalized precipitation

 

The extension of a tobacco burning device was clinched within the enamel-coated structures of his jaw

 

And cancer causing carbon particles were visible in a circular shape

 

His facial structure was wider than it was tall

His spherical abdominal region


Vibrated upon guffaw, resembling a food basin at capacity with sweet, semisolid preserve

 

His weight-to-height ratio was disproportionate; while he correctly personified a character portrayed in a seasonal holiday movie classic starring Will Ferrell

 

And there was humor in his antics, despite my presence

 

A non-flirtatious closing one eye, and a rotation of his neck

 

Soon indicated he was friend and not foe and therefore there was no need to seek outside mutual aid

 

He remained silent and demonstrated a commendable work ethic

 

And he filled the long sock receptacles; then made a quick, sudden movement

 

And he placed his index digit beside his nostril trunk

 

And with acknowledgement, he ascended the combustion chamber vent

 

He extradited himself to his transport, then repeated the high-pitched sound

 

And away the individual and his mammals departed through a control ascent in the atmosphere, similar in nature to the seed disbursement mechanism of certain plants

 

But I was able to discern his verbal proclamation as he departed from vision

 

Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night… despite the edits.

 

©2018 Diversified Media, LLC dba Gerard Braud Communications

Crisis communications and media training expert Gerard Braud, CSP, Fellow IEC is based in New Orleans. Organizations on five continents have relied on him to write their crisis communications plans and to train their spokespeople. He is the author of “Don’t Talk to the Media Until…”

More crisis communications articles:

Please Pick Me to be Your Media Trainer

The Biggest Lie in Crisis Communications

4 Steps Every Company Needs to Take in Order to Avoid the Default Spokesperson

PR and Communications People: It’s Time to Re-evaluate Your Life

/0 Comments/in /by

concept-1868728_1920By Gerard Braud

Public relations and corporate communications professionals: It’s time to look at your life. The kids are back in school. The Labor Day weekend is behind you. Co-workers have all wrapped up their summer vacations. For the first time since Memorial Day the entire staff is all in one place at one time. What was not even a second thought last week is suddenly urgent and important.

Is “work – life” balance possible for people in public relations? Experience tells me many public relations professionals get stressed trying to complete job tasks while also balancing their family or personal life, especially this time of year.

Do you feel invigorated to recommit yourself to achieving end of year goals? Or do you feel stressed because so much has gone unaccomplished all summer and now deadline pressures are looming?

If you had work-life balance you would feel neither re-invigorated nor stressed after Labor Day because you live your entire year in balance rather than the ups and downs and ebbs and flow of a chaotic corporate existence.

Here are three ways to level out your life.

1) Implement a rolling 12-month calendar

Develop a strategic communications plan based on a rolling 12-month calendar and stop planning your communications based on either your calendar year or your fiscal year. When PR people live by a calendar year there is the “fresh start” syndrome of January, complete with soon-to-fail New Year resolutions. Next you spend January and February getting ready to get ready.

March, April and May are your busy times of the year, with pauses for spring break and Memorial Day. Little gets accomplished in the summer because too many people who impact your goals and projects are on vacation. By the time you regroup after Labor Day, it takes several weeks to get rolling again, similar to New Years. By mid-September you are productive again and you stay focused through Halloween. Your mind then starts planning for Thanksgiving break and then for Christmas. Before you know it, New Years rolls around and you hit reset all over again.

Does this sound like you? If so, it appears you have five productive months a year and seven months of distractions.

Set a goal from September 2014, through September 2015. Strategically plan all of your goals and deadlines for training, publications, etc. On October 1, 2014, extend the strategic plans and goals by one additional month, through October 2015. Keep doing this at the first of every month and you now have a rolling 12-month calendar.

2) Plan around the obstacles

When you build your 12-month rolling calendar, set clear, hard deadlines. Identify the times of the year when people are inaccessible, such as in the summer, and plan around those challenges. If you need a team meeting or a training program next June, send the invitations out now, before people fill their calendars with vacation dates. That will make next summer more productive because you planned so far in advance. Everything won’t come to a grinding halt.

3) Budget accordingly

A 12-month rolling calendar will make the budgeting process easier. You should set clear goals now to spend your remaining budgets before the end of your calendar or fiscal year, so you don’t lose those dollars. But as you enter your new budgeting phase and make budget requests, you should also schedule on your calendar exactly when you plan to spend your dollars for training and projects using your 12-month rolling calendar.

Planning this way allows you to get contracts in place early, which legally commits your funds to vendors now, preventing the boss from taking your money away should conditions change for the worse down the road.

Stop losing momentum. Adopt a rolling 12-month calendar that resets strategic goals and budgets at the start of each month for the next 12-months. Too many people live start and stop lives. Recommit today to end the ebb and flow to achieve greater work-life balance.

 

Crisis communications and media training expert Gerard Braud, CSP, Fellow IEC is based in New Orleans. Organizations on five continents have relied on him to write their crisis communications plans and to train their spokespeople. He is the author of “Don’t Talk to the Media Until…”

More crisis communications articles:

3 Lessons the Melania Trump Coat Can Teach All Public Relations People

The Biggest Lie in Crisis Communications

4 Steps Every Company Needs to Take in Order to Avoid the Default Spokesperson

Photo

The Most Cringe-worthy Jargon You Must Avoid

/0 Comments/in , /by

By Gerard Braud, CSP, Fellow IEC

People in public relations, media relations, and corporate communications love to make fun of jargon and most have a hit list of phrases, clichés, and abbreviations that they hate.

People hate jargon.

Employees hate jargon.

Customers hate jargon.

I once introduced, “The Worst Speech in the World” to show how cringe-worthy jargon gets.

This is not the usual keynote speech I deliver, but I could likely write a customized speech just like this for every association, conference, and convention from New Orleans to New York.

So why does your CEO, VP, or manager use jargon?https-::pixabay.com:en:conference-public-speaking-2705706:

Why do your work colleagues use jargon?

Here are some observations:

1) Many executives, business coaches, business trainers, and authors are looking for a profound phrase or expression. The “sticky” phrases get repeated by people who want to share what they learn from the coach, trainer, or author.

2) No one has taught the person using the cliché, especially in a speech, that originality is more profound then mimicking someone else. We can usually chalk this up to the speaker not having a speech or communications coach and trying to wing it.

3) The world is full of copycats who use copycat clichés. For many, it might be laziness or a time saver, to simply lift phrases they’ve heard all of their lives.

In conclusion, analogies are great. Use them with sensitivity, such as avoiding the phrase, “open kimono.”

Make your analogies original. People love original thoughts and ideas.

I invite you to add a list of the jargon you hate in the comment section below.

 

Crisis communications and media training expert Gerard Braud, CSP, Fellow IEC is based in New Orleans. Organizations on five continents have relied on him to write their crisis communications plans and to train their spokespeople. He is the author of “Don’t Talk to the Media Until…”

More crisis communications articles:

3 Lessons the Melania Trump Coat Can Teach All Public Relations People

The Biggest Lie in Crisis Communications

4 Steps Every Company Needs to Take in Order to Avoid the Default Spokesperson

 

Photo

The Worst Professional Jargon Examples: 3 Tips for Effective Communications

/0 Comments/in /by

By Gerard Braud, CSP, Fellow IEC

People hate jargon.

Employees hate jargon.

Customers hate jargon.

People love to make fun of jargon and most have a hit list of phrases, clichés, and abbreviations that they hate. I invite you to add a list of the ones you hate in the comment section below.

I introduced, “The Worst Speech in the World” to show how crazy jargon gets.

This is not the usual keynote speech I deliver, but I could likely write a customized speech just like this for every association, conference, and convention from New Orleans to New York.

So why does your CEO, VP, or manager use jargon?

Why do your work colleagues use jargon?

Here are some observations:

1) Many executives, business coaches, business trainers, and authors are looking for a profound phrase or expression. The “sticky” phrases get repeated by people who want to share what they learn from the coach, trainer, or author.

2) The world is full of copycats who use copycat clichés. For many, it might be laziness or a time saver, to simply lift phrases they’ve heard all of their lives.

3) No one has taught the person using the cliché, especially in a speech, that originality is more profound then mimicking someone else. We can usually chalk this up to the speaker not having a speech or communications coach and trying to wing it.

In conclusion, analogies are great. Use them with sensitivity, such as avoiding the phrase, “open kimono.”

Make your analogies original. People love original thoughts and ideas.

Asking for your PR opinion: What is your best tip for writing great quotes for news releases?

/0 Comments/in /by

By Gerard Braud –

 

Thumbnail BraudCast

Click image to watch and subscribe to The BraudCast

 

As a corporate writer or public relations professional, capturing the attention of your audience and writing effective news releases, let alone great quotes, is not an easy task.  That is why I am asking you to contribute to our weekly communications and PR discussion questions by sharing your best advice with your colleagues. Each week we seek your best public relations practices on the BraudCast. Your discussion question this week is, “What is your best tip for writing great quotes for news releases?”

As a journalist, a writer, a PR team member, how do you ensure you capture the attention of your audiences using quotes? How do you make sure that the quote doesn’t appear fabricated or written for the spokesperson? How do you make sure it sounds authentic, direct, and even heartfelt?

This question is one of a series of discussion questions about media relations, crisis communications, public relations, and social media. Yes, YOU are invited to share your bite size bits of best practices each week. Here is how:

Step 1: Subscribe to The BraudCast on YouTube

Step 2: You will see a short video that poses a new question every Monday. You then post your best practices and observations on The BraudCast YouTube channel.

3: Once your opinion is shared, you can follow the discussion online so you can compare your best practices to those of your professional colleagues.

Step 4: Watch the Follow up Friday Video where you will see a short YouTube video outlining some of the most interesting observations. Yes…your comments may actually show up on our BraudCast video, bringing you world-wide fame, fortune, a big raise, glory, street parades, and more.

Thanks in advance for sharing your knowledge. Please take 2 seconds now to subscribe to The BraudCast.

Sharing Your Answers: What if Your Leadership Team Listens to Corporate Lawyers More Than the PR Team?

/1 Comment/in /by

By Gerard Braud –

 

Lawyers vs PR teams gerard braud BraudCast

Click image to watch

As a public relations professional, how do you make sure that your voice is heard? How do you ensure that senior level executives and CEOs value your expertise on media training and effective communications? On Tuesday we asked corporate communicators and PR professionals to weigh in on our weekly discussion question, “If Your Leadership Team Listens to Corporate Lawyers More Than They Listen to the Public Relations Team How Do You Rectify That?” Today’s video features what your colleagues shared on social media throughout the week. Be sure to share your opinion and subscribe to the weekly question on the BraudCast YouTube Channel to participate next week.

This question is one of a series of discussion questions about media relations, crisis communications, public relations, and social media. Yes, YOU are invited to share your bite size bits of best practices each week. Here is how:

Step 1: Subscribe to The BraudCast on YouTube

Step 2: You will see a short video that poses a new question every Monday. You then post your best practices and observations on The BraudCast YouTube channel.

3: Once your opinion is shared, you can follow the discussion online so you can compare your best practices to those of your professional colleagues.

Step 4: Watch the Follow-up Video where you will see a short YouTube video outlining some of the most interesting observations. Yes…your comments may actually show up on our BraudCast video, bringing you world-wide fame, fortune, a big raise, glory, street parades, and more.

Thanks in advance for sharing your knowledge. Please take 2 seconds now to subscribe to The BraudCast.

Question of the week: Should companies have a social media policy for employees?

/0 Comments/in /by

By Gerard Braud –

This week and every week on the BraudCast YouTube Channel we are posing a question for corporate communicators and public relations experts. The question this week is, “Should companies have a social media policy for employees?” There are plenty of company policies regarding human resources and ethics, but is your company really covering the pressing issue of social media? In today’s fast paced communications running at the speed of Twitter, your employees could present a huge crisis for your organization in just 140 characters.

Please share your thoughts and join our weekly discussions by posting here on the blog, on social media or on today’s YouTube video. Later this week I am sharing your expert tips as well as my own opinion in another video. Please subscribe to the weekly question on the BraudCast YouTube Channel to participate.

Click here to watch & subscribe to the BraudCast

Click here to watch & subscribe to the BraudCast

This question is one of a series of discussion questions about media relations, crisis communications, public relations, and social media. Yes, YOU are invited to share your bite size bits of best practices each week. Here is how:

Step 1: Subscribe to The BraudCast on YouTube

Step 2: You will see a short video that poses a new question every Monday. You then post your best practices and observations on The BraudCast YouTube channel.

3: Once your opinion is shared, you can follow the discussion online so you can compare your best practices to those of your professional colleagues.

Step 4: Watch the Follow up Friday Video where you will see a short YouTube video outlining some of the most interesting observations. Yes…your comments may actually show up on our BraudCast video, bringing you world-wide fame, fortune, a big raise, glory, street parades, and more.

Thanks in advance for sharing your knowledge. Please take 2 seconds now to subscribe to The BraudCast.

What is the best way to get in touch with a busy reporter?

/0 Comments/in /by

By Gerard Braud –

For public relations professionals and corporate communicators, it can be difficult to grab the attention of the media.  I am asking for your bite-sized bits of best practices for getting in touch with busy reporters. This week and every week we seek your best communications practices on the BraudCast. Please share your comments on our social media and subscribe to the weekly question on the BraudCast YouTube Channel to participate each week.

Click here to watch and subscribe to the BraudCast

Click here to watch and subscribe to the BraudCast

This question is one of a series of discussion questions about media relations, crisis communications, public relations, and social media. Yes, YOU are invited to share your bite size bits of best practices each week. Here is how:

Step 1: Subscribe to The BraudCast on YouTube

Step 2: You will see a short video that poses a new question every Monday. You then post your best practices and observations on The BraudCast YouTube channel.

3: Once your opinion is shared, you can follow the discussion online so you can compare your best practices to those of your professional colleagues.

Step 4: Watch the Follow up Friday Video where you will see a short YouTube video outlining some of the most interesting observations. Yes…your comments may actually show up on our BraudCast video, bringing you world-wide fame, fortune, a big raise, glory, street parades, and more.

Thanks in advance for sharing your knowledge. Please take 2 seconds now to subscribe to The BraudCast.

Your answers: How do you best respond when people get angry on your social media site?

/0 Comments/in /by

By Gerard Braud –

Social media can be a double edged sword for your corporation, school, or organization. It can be very positive and very negative at times. This week I asked corporate communicators and public relations professionals how they best respond when people get angry on their company social media site. They shared their responses which I am featuring in this video. Please subscribe to the weekly question on the BraudCast YouTube Channel to participate each week.

Angry Social Media Q11 Gerard Braud

Click image to watch and subscribe to the BraudCast

This question is one of a series of discussion questions about media relations, crisis communications, public relations, and social media. Yes, YOU are invited to share your bite size bits of best practices each week. Here is how:

Step 1: Subscribe to The BraudCast on YouTube

Step 2: You will see a short video that poses a new question every Monday. You then post your best practices and observations on The BraudCast YouTube channel.

3: Once your opinion is shared, you can follow the discussion online so you can compare your best practices to those of your professional colleagues.

Step 4: Watch the Follow up Friday Video where you will see a short YouTube video outlining some of the most interesting observations. Yes…your comments may actually show up on our BraudCast video, bringing you world-wide fame, fortune, a big raise, glory, street parades, and more.

Thanks in advance for sharing your knowledge. Please take 2 seconds now to subscribe to The BraudCast.

What is the worst way to begin a news release?

/0 Comments/in /by

By Gerard Braud –

This week we are asking public relations professionals and media relations professionals, “What is the worst way to begin a news release?” What types of news releases get thrown in the trash by the media and your audiences?  Each week we seek your best corporate communications and crisis communications practices on the BraudCast.  Share your thoughts here and on social media and subscribe to the weekly question on the BraudCast YouTube Channel to participate each week.

Click image to watch video & Subscribe to the BraudCast

Click image to watch video & Subscribe to the BraudCast

 

This question is one of a series of discussion questions about media relations, crisis communications, public relations, and social media. Yes, YOU are invited to share your bite size bits of best practices each week. Here is how:

Step 1: Subscribe to The BraudCast on YouTube

Step 2: You will see a short video that poses a new question every Monday. You then post your best practices and observations on The BraudCast YouTube channel.

3: Once your opinion is shared, you can follow the discussion online so you can compare your best practices to those of your professional colleagues.

Step 4: Watch the Follow up Friday Video where you will see a short YouTube video outlining some of the most interesting observations. Yes…your comments may actually show up on our BraudCast video, bringing you world-wide fame, fortune, a big raise, glory, street parades, and more.

Thanks in advance for sharing your knowledge. Please take 2 seconds now to subscribe to The BraudCast.